Braverman visits Cambridge University – and looks like a dick

  • Post last modified:May 17, 2024
  • Reading time:5 mins read

Failed Tory minister, far-right bigot, and all-round shithouse Suella Braverman is still trying to grift a second career for herself – on top of, y’know, her actual job as an MP. This time, she teamed up with the also renowned far-right shithouses at GB News to go on a walkabout at the anti-genocide camp at Cambridge University. Unfortunately for Braverman, she ended up making Alan Partridge look competent. JURASSIC PARK!

UK universities in protest over genocide

As the Canary has documented, there have already been violent crackdowns around the student protests in the US. Meanwhile, protests have been erupting in Greece and the Netherlands. And now, they’ve been spreading to the UK.

Students and staff set up encampments have been set up in both Manchester and Sheffield in recent weeks – as well as Edinburgh, Bristol, Leeds, Newcastle, Goldsmiths in London, and Warwick.

For example, in Sheffield students are protesting over their university’s complicity in Israel genocide. The university’s involvement in F-35 production supplying Israel is part of a pattern of close ties with the arms industry. In 2022, a freedom of information request (FOI) revealed that Sheffield took at least £72m in investment from the arms trade over the preceding decade.

Then, university camps spread further – with LSE, SOAS, King’s College, Exeter, Queen Mary, and Oxford. Predictably, the far-right and Zionists (it’s hard to tell the difference sometimes, we know) have mobilised to disrupt and attack some camps:

So, what do these students REALLY need even more than a visit from the far-right? A visit from a far-right MP with a far-right media outlet in hot pursuit, of course. Because that’s exactly what happened on Thursday 16 May. A-ha!

Braverman: that was classic intercourse!

Suella Braverman – she of twice-sacked because she’s too corrupt and extreme even for the Tories fame – thought a walkaround at the Cambridge University camp with some nobody from GB News would be a good photo op. Back of the net!

Maybe she was bored – and dismantling her Corby Trouser Press in the Cambridge Travelodge didn’t appeal. However, clearly Braverman hadn’t factored in that she is a massive cunt, therefore the notoriously left-wing Cambridge student cohort wouldn’t particularly want to engage with her.

So, for a whole two-and-a-half minutes every student Braverman tried to speak with ignored her:

Poor Suella Partridge could not understand why no one wanted to engage:

She may have got further if she’d asked them whether or not the petrol cap on a Ford Focus is offside rear.

Thursday bloody Thursday

Braverman waffled something about the Cambridge University students being some of the ‘brightest and best students’ who are ‘taught in the art of articulation’. Clearly, she hadn’t considered that they are of course far brighter than she or whatever dullard GB News producer came up with the ludicrous stunt – because the students weren’t going to fall for what was obviously supposed to be a stitch up.

So, Suella and GB News had a wasted trip.

Maybe her time in Cambridge could have been better spent flying a helicopter around. You know, swooping down over a field. Scaring a donkey so that it falls into a river. Hovering over one of those annoying families that go on holidays on bikes. And shouting at them “get out of the area!” and watching them panic…

Featured image via GB News – screengrab and the Canary

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